You ARE Worthy: Putting in the Work as a Love Athlete
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As an athlete, you know that if you put the work in, something better will happen. That applies to love too. You can have more love if you want it, and are willing to work on yourself.
The pain of loneliness you feel is a lack of self-love, and it should drive you to seek healing. So don't shove your pain or sadness away by self-medicating with cynical/defeatist attitudes, a new "situationship," shopping, drugs, meaningless sex or alcohol. Listen to that pain. What is it trying to teach you?
It makes no sense to envy couples that you see in public, because you don't know the real underpinnings of their relationship. It may look like it's all love on the outside, but there could be toxic elements, codependency… you just can't tell but looking at them together out in the park or at the mall.
Sometimes the issue is not that you don't want to wait for the right person to come along, but that another person sees YOU as not worth the wait.
Worthiness is a spin-off of feeling that you are not enough.
"When you're a queen, when you're amazing, you don't have to talk about it, tell people or wear a t-shirt saying so.
You just ARE… and you let OTHERS say so." – Daniel Packard
Your sense of worthiness makes you attract what you think deserve. So do you attract mates that fulfill you, or mates that make you struggle to get love?
If you ask yourself why you're struggling in your relationships, or thinking your requests/concerns to your partner are a burden or a bother, it could be an effect of your lack of feeling worthy of being treated with love and respect. You are worthy of being listened to and having your needs met in a relationship.
People respond to "Do you think you could maybe…" differently than the more assertive, "I need to tell you what my needs are." When you feel worthy, you don't beg for attention or affection. You tell (in an assertive manner, not bossy).
What You Can Do
Don't become jaded to the point where you don't think you need to be with anyone, ever. If you're taking time between relationships to heal, that's good, but don't AVOID or reject the possibility of a relationship because of fear due to past hurts. There's a difference between saying "I don't want a relationship" and "I don't want another relationship like the one I just had."
You may think you believe you are worthy of love, but here are two ways to be sure:
- Look at the type of mates you're attracting… how do they treat you? Do they respect you?
- Do you believe you are good enough and deserve the best love possible, a 10 (on a scale of 10), or do you feel more like a 7 or less?
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